On Candor
"Thanks for being so candid"
Ughh - I hate that phrase more than any other. I hate it because it means the discussion is over and the other person has taken the easy way out of the conversation. In case you are unfamiliar with the phrase, here are some sample usages ...
Me: We need a dedicated QA staff.
They: Thanks for being so candid, but blah blah blah.
Me: We need something that at least resembles requirements.
They: Thanks for being so candid, but blah blah blah.
Me: Defect-free software is an unrealistic goal.
They: Thanks for being so candid, but blah blah blah.
And I think its funny that people think it is a compliment. Of course I am going to provide candid opinions - its much harder to try and lie.
Comments
Im similarly touched by folks that complete e-mails with a terse "Please advise."
I hate it.
Theres an heir of demand about that which I find impolite, pushy and unnecessary.
I guess I far prefer, "What do you think?"
A web search on "Please advise" will reveal that Im not the only one either bugged or smitten with it.
Sounds like you need a vacation.
I hear ya. I go through this kinda crap every day. Its like the bluntness is too incomprehensible for them. Shamefully, I think its because they have grown accustom to being lied to. Talk about unfortunate. IMO, this down-to-earth, keepin it real, bottom-line type of attitude should be treated as gold!
Regards...
Dear Matt, are you ok? Have been reading your good tech articles, then all of a sudden out of the blue, this post. Not saying you should only write tech, but hope everything is alright at work.
Wow, all of those sound so familiar right now. I do believe I can actually hear my managers voice while reading them.
Thank you for being so candid them! :)
Well, at least thank you is in the phrase, sometimes I would hear, go away freak!!
Patrick Handel -
Nice. People do that were I am at too. I figured it was one of those quirks that was specific to my company. I guess not.
BTW – did you see this? I would sooo buy that.
@Valamas -
So true.
@Josh -
I wish you were my boss - it sounds like we would get along great ;)
@Ray -
Thanks for asking Ray. This post doesn’t really have thing to do specifically with were I am at now, but more of a common thread through my career that I just detected last night while I was out for a jog. And I enjoy the irony in how the phrase is used. Figured I would pass it along.
No worries though – this was mostly a wild hair. I will be back to tech blogging real soon ;)
@Elizabeth -
I am glad I am not alone. I was beginning to think all of my managers had the same college professor or something …
@Muhammad -
I love reading comments that make me laugh out loud. Thanks Muhammad – now go away you freak ;)
If I had a nickel for everytime I heard that or something close, I could retire.
I agree that we would get along great, although I am fairly certain you would be the boss :D
Be advised, I thank you for being so candid. My favorite is the PM that calls daily and asks for a Status on where are we? This statement insinuates a baseline to report status or a ratio of completeness, yet there is no SRS - not even a napkin with a simple The system shall... - and the deliverable is due to the client on Monday. BTW, today is the Friday before that Monday... Have a good weekend. Peace... -Dan
Heh! Cant you answer with "No problem! I dont know how you can stand all those other people constantly lying to you!" ?
LOL Matt!
Just started with a new private web firm after 8 years of government work. Within the first month I start to introduce some basic concept of SDLC with a traceability matrix and functional requirements and get the:
"oh.... documentation... no we dont need that we make useable software (designer) "
me: "what does requirements gathering and traceability have to do with that?"
them: "it limits our collective design freedom"...
me: ???
:)
Just wanted to let you know youre not alone - keep up the good work I love the articles jQuery and ASP.NET 4 eva! ;)
best,
kevin
All I just can say is: You are my hero.